Money Psychology

10 Types of People You Should Not Be Spending Your Time With

February 22, 2023

We all have that one friend we hang out with way too much to the extent that we are Siamese-d in life.

This person could be the one who low-key discourages us from pursuing our goals or dissuades us from taking a chance by giving us the impression that there is more time and what needs to be done now is what they like e.g. partying non-stop or some other time-consuming activities which could be detrimental to our general wellbeing.

They may be telling us there is no need to hurry or that there is always another time when this can be done. At the end of it, we may realise too late that they are time wasters who cost us in the long run.

If this sounds like something you have experienced or gone through, then this piece is meant for you. It is meant to help you live a filtered life by helping you identify people you need to kick out of your life by cutting down on the time you spend with them.

Some individuals are not only utterly harmful to your heart and spirit but also your finances.

More importantly, it's crucial to make deliberate judgments about who we spend time with because, whether we like it or not, who we hang out with eventually influences the choices we make in life.

Jim Rohn once said that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. This observation should jolt us due to the fact that those five people in our circle also have people in their circle whom they spend time with and so on and so forth.

With this, the influences they bring to you could also have been borrowed from their friends. This could complicate matters since you have to be wise enough to sift through what is helpful and what is not. It all takes time so be careful with whom you have in your circle and spend time with.

Therefore, here are 10 types of people you should immediately remove from your life.

1. The Chronic Complainer

These are people who constantly complain about how miserable their lives are or whine about everything, but they rarely take any action. By being around a complainer all the time, it will gradually wear you down. You may start to partake in the complaints, and before you realise it, you've taken on the friend's pessimistic outlook.

To arrest the situation before it gets out of hand, make sure to limit your time with anyone that fits this description if they are a part of your life.

2. The Critic

A critic, in every aspect of your life, can be quite harmful, especially if they are only focused on the negatives. Critics may never use derogatory language toward you, but they may frequently belittle your opinions, appearance, and thinking.

This kind of person looks for any justification to criticise you and limit your development as a person rather than make solutions to help you change them. This friend may critique your every action: "Are you going to wear that? Why don’t you ever...? What's wrong with you, exactly?” The list is endless. No matter how hard you try, you feel inferior and think you can never do anything well.

On the flip side, a good critic is one who goes beyond your shortfalls seeking to understand why they are happening.

"I am aware that you frequently do this. Are you having difficulties with…? How can I help?” This is a person with healthy criticism who places the responsibility on the activity rather than you as a person.

If the former is in your circle, you are better off without them which will be so much better for your well-being overall.

3. The Personal Space Invader

Have you had people in your circle who like to make your place/house the hangout place, always visiting unannounced or on short notice or randomly dropping by even when they know you are working from home, etc.?

Well, a friend like this needs to be kicked out ASAP before things head south for you. A person who does not respect your personal space or your boundaries is not an asset but a liability especially when it comes to time. Let them know that they are no longer welcome unless they change their habits and become respectful.

A personal space invader will not respect your time no matter what you could be doing or how tight it could be. They will always have a reason to be in your space regardless of whether you are in a position to host them or not. Act before it is too late to get the dignity of your space respected.

4. Those Who Take You For Granted

Being present for the people you care about is crucial, but it's vital to understand when you are respected and when you are being treated with contempt or being taken advantage of. Do not waste your precious time on friends who don't even appreciate what you have to offer and those who are with you only for what they can get from you.

Cut off people who take you for granted and those who do not respect you for who you are. They are time wasters who will leave at the slightest hint of you not doing well or if someone better comes along.

5. The Conformer

In relationships, there are people who will never challenge you even when what you offer is the worst or could be better. These are the conformers who, sadly, are the most popular in friendships. They comply with whatever you say and will not in any way challenge the status quo.

For you to grow and to get the most out of your time, you need to get rid of such friends since they will never challenge you to be better. They will always agree with you even when the decision is detrimental to all of you. At the end of it, they will most likely shrug their shoulders and say there’s nothing they could have done.

They are a liability to you and end up being some of the biggest time wasters for you.

6. The Narcissist

This person believes that they understand everything, excels in every endeavor, and will stop at nothing to brag about it. No matter how knowledgeable or skilled you are, a narcissist will always work to outdo you in words, usually.

Since a narcissist elevates themselves above you and casts you in a demeaning light, they will rarely have anything good to say about you. Hence, such a person should not be near you as a friend.

A red flag for you is if you have that nagging feeling as though you are constantly in conflict with this person. Narcissists frequently lack understanding and empathy, hesitate to make concessions, and crave attention. Due to their persistent demand for praise and outshining you, they may destroy important events for you including career milestones. Avoid such a person at all costs.

7. The Doubter

For someone who keeps forcing you to keep delaying your dreams, then they could be having doubts about your capabilities.

Such people are some of the biggest time wasters we can have as friends since instead of encouraging you to pursue your dreams, they continually dim your light by sowing seeds of doubt in you.

As long as you have the fortitude, desire, and passion for pursuing anything, nobody has the right to limit your ability to do something. Make your own decisions about what you can and cannot do. The best way to do this is by dropping the doubter from your circle of friends.

8. Those Jealous of You

We all tend to confuse a few people in our lives for being our "close" friends when, in reality, they should never be less than ten feet from us, always. They'll simply pretend to be happy for you and your achievements but they'll always be secretly envious of your life.

Such folks should be kicked out of your life since they will eventually ruin you.

Similar to the “personal space invader”, this friend will feign friendship, so they are always in the know of what you are up to. Being envious to the point of wishing you ills is such a friend who will celebrate with you but hoping your downfall deep down.

While there may be a healthy level of envy among friends, those seriously affected by your success may become negative in their comments, start avoiding you, talk about you behind your back, etc. Once you discern them, let them not have an extra second of your time since they are a liability to your well-being.

9. Those Who Only Add Pressure

And then, some will just be pressuring you to do this and that even when you are not in a position to. These kinds of friends will be pushing you to your breaking points and still not have sympathy even when you need a break or you are feeling down.

They could be pressuring you to marry sooner, get more money or live or act in a way that society accepts despite the fact that that is not who you are.

When this happens, you are at liberty to drop them as friends and stop spending time with them since some things and decisions in life can only be made by you.

Don’t let the pressure lead you to make decisions that are not yours.

10. The Party Animal

Usually, the person who wants to go out drinking every night in your group is the party animal. These people frequently make it difficult for you to stay focused on your goals. While it is important to unwind and clear your mind so you can focus again, going out every night will not help you achieve the kind of life you want. It serves more as a diversion than anything else which will affect most facets of your life. If you don't limit your time spent with the individual who always wants to go out, you'll lose focus on everything you're attempting to do.

Cut such friends off for your benefit and for you to be able to grow in life.

Wrapping up

How the people around you can affect you

Going back to Jim Rohn, we are the average of the people we spend the most time with.

Reading Robert Kiyosaki’s Rich Dad, Poor Dad, you can tell how much the people around you influence your thoughts and actions. Your awareness and personal fortitude come first. Then, group awareness (consciousness) of the people you are surrounded by.

Even if you are the most intelligent and conscious person in the world, your development in life will be impacted if you are continuously exposed to negative, fear-based individuals. A limited drawback that your unfavourable pals can cause you may exist if you are firmly grounded.

However, there isn't much of an upside because you're hanging out with individuals who aren't going to help you advance.

You will develop into a proactive person if you associate with successful and optimistic people who take responsibility for their lives but on the flip side, even if you are originally a cheerful person, you will eventually start to sink into a pool of negativity if you hang around with a group of pessimists who think that everything is against them.

With this in mind, make the most of your relationships by making sure that you get the best returns for your time investment in these relationships. If not, then you will be wasting a lot of opportunities being with the wrong people in your life.

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Njenga has over 8 years experience in multimedia and business journalism both as a writer, editor and producer. He has over 5 years of experience in radio broadcasting as a news reader, reporter and presenter. He is also a 2012 Earth Journalism Network-EJN Fellow.